Epic Social Gaming Experience

StoneRoses

Personally I am an Ambivert, but for me it was always a learning experience. I can't really say I was ever an Introvert. I was mostly scared as I didn't know how to interact with folks due to the limited exposure I had growing up.

Being poor can be rewarding, for those of you who understand this, look at us now!

sunandshadow

What is the definition of a balanced social gamer?  I'm an introvert in real life, and about the same amount social in games, which is that I can hold a conversation without problems or work quietly next to someone, but I don't really like participating in close or organized teamwork, or loud group gatherings.

For the most part I don't actively want to interact with other people unless I'm attracted to them or interested in their music, writing, or other hobby.

Octagon7711

I'm a moody gamer.  Depends on how I feel that day.

Phry

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Grunty

Xodic said:

DMKano said:

I am a person.
I like to play games.

All these labels we put on ourselves and others.... why?

Introvert, extrovert - ambivert? According to what standard, what baseline? 

Anti social - balanced social..? Again - what's the baseline?

These are purely subjective terms without defining a clear baseline.

How can one even begin to go down this rabbit hole, and more importantly why?

So, just put you down as complicated?

Most people are complicated.

JGarcia

i don't know how to start a discussion can someone help me?

StoneRoses

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

SEANMCAD

DMKano said:

StoneRoses said:

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

I know what they mean. I am questioning the validity of anyone being able to objectively categorize themselves (which to Xodics point, they cannot) - so thats why I am bringing this up

yes people can objectively categorize themselves and they do not need someone else to do it for them and no its not something worth debating about.

SEANMCAD

Xodic said:

SEANMCAD said:

DMKano said:

StoneRoses said:

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

I know what they mean. I am questioning the validity of anyone being able to objectively categorize themselves (which to Xodics point, they cannot) - so thats why I am bringing this up

yes people can objectively categorize themselves and they do not need someone else to do it for them and no its not something worth debating about.

By definition, you cannot objectively analyze yourself. 

Objective - being the object of perception or thought; belonging to the object of thought rather than to the thinking subject (opposed to subjective ).

Subjective - existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought (opposed to objective ).

pertaining to or characteristic of an individual; personal; individual: 

right so you can not determine anything about yourself and only other peple can

so if you want to know if you like a meal you not you have to ask someone else.

horseshit.

SEANMCAD

DMKano said:

SEANMCAD said:

DMKano said:

StoneRoses said:

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

I know what they mean. I am questioning the validity of anyone being able to objectively categorize themselves (which to Xodics point, they cannot) - so thats why I am bringing this up

yes people can objectively categorize themselves and they do not need someone else to do it for them and no its not something worth debating about.

People can objectively categorize themselves when there is a clear way of measurment like a weight scale. You can objectively measure your weight.

On the other hand someone saying they are an ambivert - what was measured and how?

Its basically people just saying what they think at the moment - without clear data

dude I am not having a conversation about how its not possible for me to determine what I like to eat and thusly I need to ask someone else.

resolve that problem yourself.

Sovrath

DMKano said:

I am a person.
I like to play games.

All these labels we put on ourselves and others.... why?

Introvert, extrovert - ambivert? According to what standard, what baseline? 

Anti social - balanced social..? Again - what's the baseline?

These are purely subjective terms without defining a clear baseline.

How can one even begin to go down this rabbit hole, and more importantly why?

Well, I'm pretty sure when I meet people I can tell if they are an extrovert or an introvert so there is a line.

At times it's so painfully obvious. Heck, I have introvert friends who just like small groups and being in crowds or large groups "drains" them.

Knowing what type of person you are can also help you and others with how you move through life. As long as one doesn't attach a stigma to it then it's fine. It's when people starting using "types" to negatively assess another that we get into trouble.

SEANMCAD

Xodic said:

SEANMCAD said:

Xodic said:

SEANMCAD said:

DMKano said:

StoneRoses said:

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

I know what they mean. I am questioning the validity of anyone being able to objectively categorize themselves (which to Xodics point, they cannot) - so thats why I am bringing this up

yes people can objectively categorize themselves and they do not need someone else to do it for them and no its not something worth debating about.

By definition, you cannot objectively analyze yourself. 

Objective - being the object of perception or thought; belonging to the object of thought rather than to the thinking subject (opposed to subjective ).

Subjective - existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought (opposed to objective ).

pertaining to or characteristic of an individual; personal; individual: 

right so you can not determine anything about yourself and only other peple can

so if you want to know if you like a meal you not you have to ask someone else.

horseshit.

That's not what I'm suggesting at all. I'm simply stating that the second you have an inward thought it's implicit subjective reasoning. It's what makes us who we are, you could say it's the essence of sentient beings.

use whatever bizzare logic you want to justify it for yourself but when you look at the conclusions of your logic its fucking silly.

'oh I have no idea if I like to stay at home and watch a movie I have to ask someone else?' dont use me as a sounding bored to find ways to get your logic to match up to sanity not intrested its silly

cameltosis

SEANMCAD said:

Xodic said:

SEANMCAD said:

Xodic said:

SEANMCAD said:

DMKano said:

StoneRoses said:

Phry said:

I had to google what ambivert was, and about all i could work out was that it was someone who ws neither an introvert, nor an extrovert which sounds like another way of saying, normal or average
Personally, i am a social gamer, i can lose significant time in game just talking to others

Ambivert has been a late introduction not characterized as normal, people are starting to see more of them. Just someone who can balance the other two personality traits.

Extroverts were considered normal for the longest time. 

Introverts, well if you were not an Extrovert folks felt there was something wrong with you. However, this is not the case anymore. 

@DMKano baseline? I went the impression that you are ever bit as intelligent to know what these mean, @Phry ;had the right idea and looked them. Think of it as an Epic Adventure without the quest giver. 

I know what they mean. I am questioning the validity of anyone being able to objectively categorize themselves (which to Xodics point, they cannot) - so thats why I am bringing this up

yes people can objectively categorize themselves and they do not need someone else to do it for them and no its not something worth debating about.

By definition, you cannot objectively analyze yourself. 

Objective - being the object of perception or thought; belonging to the object of thought rather than to the thinking subject (opposed to subjective ).

Subjective - existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought (opposed to objective ).

pertaining to or characteristic of an individual; personal; individual: 

right so you can not determine anything about yourself and only other peple can

so if you want to know if you like a meal you not you have to ask someone else.

horseshit.

That's not what I'm suggesting at all. I'm simply stating that the second you have an inward thought it's implicit subjective reasoning. It's what makes us who we are, you could say it's the essence of sentient beings.

use whatever bizzare logic you want to justify it for yourself but when you look at the conclusions of your logic its fucking silly.

'oh I have no idea if I like to stay at home and watch a movie I have to ask someone else?' dont use me as a sounding bored to find ways to get your logic to match up to sanity not intrested its silly

And Sean derails yet another thread....


On topic, I went for Ambivert Social Gamer. 

I'm not sure I like the term ambivert, but in most of the personality tests I've done I do come out pretty much perfectly balanced between intro and extrovert, so it sounded right. In terms of how you classify someone, it seems to come down to energy levels. 

If being social is a draining experience, i.e. it takes effort to be in social situations, then you are introverted, whereas if being social is an energising experience then you are an extrovert. I imagine most people experience both. For myself, I find most social situations pretty draining as I have little tolerance for dumb people (and most are dumb by comparison) and I don't participate in popular culture which makes small talk quite difficult. That said, when I find the right group of people or the right situations, I find it really energising. 

MMOs are one of the right situations. Naturally, everyone around you has a similar interest. There are clear goals and rules, a need for leaders and followers. There are tons of opportunities for small talk and making friends in game enhances the whole experience. So, in MMOs, I come across as very extroverted / social and always end up in leadership roles with large amounts of friends, many of whom are now friends in real life too. As I'm an endgame focused player, the game tends to weed out a lot of the dumb people too as apparently endgame is too hard for a lot of people. 

Sovrath

cameltosis said:

And Sean derails yet another thread....


On topic, I went for Ambivert Social Gamer. 

I'm not sure I like the term ambivert, but in most of the personality tests I've done I do come out pretty much perfectly balanced between intro and extrovert, so it sounded right. In terms of how you classify someone, it seems to come down to energy levels. 

If being social is a draining experience, i.e. it takes effort to be in social situations, then you are introverted, whereas if being social is an energising experience then you are an extrovert. I imagine most people experience both. For myself, I find most social situations pretty draining as I have little tolerance for dumb people (and most are dumb by comparison) and I don't participate in popular culture which makes small talk quite difficult. That said, when I find the right group of people or the right situations, I find it really energising. 

Exactly! Also I'm curious if the right group of people can ever be more than, say, 10 for you? Can you feel energized in a social setting of 100 people? Just curious.

For me I'm always energized by large groups of people in a social setting.

While I love my friends in intimate groups I really like large parties with a lot of people. Mostly theme parties or dinner parties - NOT frat parties or some such thing.

cameltosis

Sovrath said:

cameltosis said:

And Sean derails yet another thread....


On topic, I went for Ambivert Social Gamer. 

I'm not sure I like the term ambivert, but in most of the personality tests I've done I do come out pretty much perfectly balanced between intro and extrovert, so it sounded right. In terms of how you classify someone, it seems to come down to energy levels. 

If being social is a draining experience, i.e. it takes effort to be in social situations, then you are introverted, whereas if being social is an energising experience then you are an extrovert. I imagine most people experience both. For myself, I find most social situations pretty draining as I have little tolerance for dumb people (and most are dumb by comparison) and I don't participate in popular culture which makes small talk quite difficult. That said, when I find the right group of people or the right situations, I find it really energising. 

Exactly! Also I'm curious if the right group of people can ever be more than, say, 10 for you? Can you feel energized in a social setting of 100 people? Just curious.

For me I'm always energized by large groups of people in a social setting.

While I love my friends in intimate groups I really like large parties with a lot of people. Mostly theme parties or dinner parties - NOT frat parties or some such thing.

It depends on the level of interaction required and the type of interaction, combined with my own perceived level of authority. 

Parties are an odd one to judge, simply because they usually involve alcohol / drugs which changes the way I act and perceive the world. Also, with large groups, you tend to gravitate into smaller cliques anyway. 

I think confidence and rules / etiquette play a big part. So, when I was guild leader, I had no problem being the centre of attention and felt extremely energised when chatting to the whole guild, whether it be ingame chat, on vent or in real life. But, those situations were all tightly controlled by rules - we had goals, classes, levels, guild tools etc which made navigating those social situations really easy. I was also highly confident about the subject matter - I knew those games inside out and confident in my ability to run the guild. 

I imagine this is the same for you with themed parties or dinner parties - there is a certain etiquette expected and icebreakers already in place which makes the socialising easier to begin with. 


Conversely, I belong to a roller derby league with maybe 100 active members and we have loads of events. There is always a large social component, especially the after parties, but I find these very draining unless I'm drunk. I think this is because my own perceived level of authority within the derby community isn't very high (I'm not the best skater and haven't played many games) so I don't feel confident expressing my opinions about our one common interest.

I think part of this is just my personality though: intelligence is the trait I value most, but this means I never want to say anything that might sound dumb. In large social situations, the conversation often moves very quickly so I don't have the time to think about what I'm saying if I want to join in, but I have to think about what I'm saying so I often can't join in, unless the subject matter is something I'm already confident about. This results in situations where my brain is moving at a million miles an hour, trying to absorb everything others are saying and trying to come up with intelligent things to say, but always being 1 step behind so never joining in. I'm getting tired thinking so hard, but never getting the payback of decent social interaction. 


Hmm, humans are weird!

Octagon7711

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

Sovrath

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

SEANMCAD

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Sovrath

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Well that's the thing, in the moment I didn't understand her level of introversion. In the moment I thought she was just living a very lonely, sad life. It wasn't until she said that she just wanted to see her co-workers in small doses that I truly understood.

SEANMCAD

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Well that's the thing, in the moment I didn't understand her level of introversion. In the moment I thought she was just living a very lonely, sad life. It wasn't until she said that she just wanted to see her co-workers in small doses that I truly understood.

thats a nice thing to say but unfortunately not related to what I just said

Sovrath

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Well that's the thing, in the moment I didn't understand her level of introversion. In the moment I thought she was just living a very lonely, sad life. It wasn't until she said that she just wanted to see her co-workers in small doses that I truly understood.

thats a nice thing to say but unfortunately not related to what I just said

But it does. 

you said: 

"and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are"

And in the moment that is what I was saying. Not understanding that someone could be "that" introverted when they had no one in their life, of course I was thinking that they should be around people ...."

It was her insistence that even though she had no one in her life she still wanted very few people in her life that I learned something about that level of introversion.

It's possible that others, if they are truly saying that that introverts should try being around other people, might not realize that level of introversion is real.

Kyleran

I'm not sure where I fit in but I am a great actor so I think many people who know me at work or other social gatherings would call me an extrovert. 

But the truth is while I enjoy interacting with others I don't actually like other people much. (That make any sense?)

I think I expect too much from others so eventually the longer I know them the more likely it is they will disappoint.

When I was younger I made deliberate efforts to be social and make friends. But these days I find no need for them and either spend time with my family or am happy to be alone with my cats. 

SEANMCAD

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Well that's the thing, in the moment I didn't understand her level of introversion. In the moment I thought she was just living a very lonely, sad life. It wasn't until she said that she just wanted to see her co-workers in small doses that I truly understood.

thats a nice thing to say but unfortunately not related to what I just said

But it does. 

you said: 

"and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are"

And in the moment that is what I was saying. Not understanding that someone could be "that" introverted when they had no one in their life, of course I was thinking that they should be around people ...."

It was her insistence that even though she had no one in her life she still wanted very few people in her life that I learned something about that level of introversion.

It's possible that others, if they are truly saying that that introverts should try being around other people, might not realize that level of introversion is real.

no I am sorry and I promise you I am not trying to be confrontational it is not addressing what I am saying. let me re do it differently

Me: 'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
Another person: 'ah but you should, a social gathering is defined as being around people where you do not know who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is healthy.

are you saying a healthy social group is one in which people do not trust each other and are always trying to trigger each other? (just for my understanding) 

Sovrath

SEANMCAD said:

no I am sorry and I promise you I am not trying to be confrontational it is not addressing what I am saying. let me re do it differently

Me: 'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
Another person: 'ah but you should, a social gathering is defined as being around people where you do not know who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is healthy.

are you saying a healthy social group is one in which people do not trust each other and are always trying to trigger each other? (just for my understanding) 

Oh no. I am saying that people who might be more socially inclined and maybe even extreme extroverts might not understand the comfort that some people get "not" being in groups of people.

So in my example, at the moment I just didn't understand that a person with no family an 3 friends would still opt to be alone. Now "I know".

That's why I'm not one of these "you must group in an mmo" people. Different people get different things from mmo's, just like in life.

I do think that it's ok to have content that is just for grouping though. That seems to fly in the face of what I just said, and it does, but just like in real life, sometimes you have to step up and be a part of it.

I also think it's fine to have content that is "just for solo/small groups" as well.

SEANMCAD

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

no I am sorry and I promise you I am not trying to be confrontational it is not addressing what I am saying. let me re do it differently

Me: 'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
Another person: 'ah but you should, a social gathering is defined as being around people where you do not know who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is healthy.

are you saying a healthy social group is one in which people do not trust each other and are always trying to trigger each other? (just for my understanding) 

Oh no. I am saying that people who might be more socially inclined and maybe even extreme extroverts might not understand the comfort that some people get "not" being in groups of people.

THAT NOT WHAT I AM SAYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FACT: (true or false...not perception)
is a healthy social gathering one in which people do not know who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is healthy'

I am not saying 'it appears like that to introverts' no I am saying the extrovert is declaring that he below statement is factually accurate.

'a healthy social gathering is one in which nobody knows who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is a good thing'

sweet mother of fuck!

Kyleran

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

SEANMCAD said:

Sovrath said:

Octagon7711 said:

Ambi meaning both such as ambidextrous.   Which is why I'm moody.  Also, everyone has combinations of both traits except to different degrees.

I'm sure there are extremes as well.

I once went out with a woman where I learned that her family was dead (was always a small family) and she really didn't have many friends. I think she counted 3 people, only 1 was in the area. I was horrified as to me she seemed so alone.

In any case, she mentioned that there was going to be a holiday party at work but she wasn't going to go. My reaction was "why not, you don't have many people in your life, go out and meet some!"

Her response was that she found all those people draining and she'd rather just see a few of them outside of the event "here and there".

I gathered that anything other than very small gatherings was just not her thing. Needless to say we didn't go out again.

One of my exes was the exact opposite. She was an "uber-extrovert" was always at the center of any group or organization she was part of and was always planning some party, heading some committee and basically was always part of large events in a very visible way.

Very rarely would she balk at going to a large event. 

and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are

Well that's the thing, in the moment I didn't understand her level of introversion. In the moment I thought she was just living a very lonely, sad life. It wasn't until she said that she just wanted to see her co-workers in small doses that I truly understood.

thats a nice thing to say but unfortunately not related to what I just said

But it does. 

you said: 

"and here is where I am trying to resolve.

Picture this

'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
'ah but you should! being around people and not knowing who to trust and trying to get them triggered its all very health for you'

I know your not saying that but others are"

And in the moment that is what I was saying. Not understanding that someone could be "that" introverted when they had no one in their life, of course I was thinking that they should be around people ...."

It was her insistence that even though she had no one in her life she still wanted very few people in her life that I learned something about that level of introversion.

It's possible that others, if they are truly saying that that introverts should try being around other people, might not realize that level of introversion is real.

no I am sorry and I promise you I am not trying to be confrontational it is not addressing what I am saying. let me re do it differently

Me: 'I am a loner I really dont like being around people'
Another person: 'ah but you should, a social gathering is defined as being around people where you do not know who to trust and everyone is trying to trigger each other and this is healthy.

are you saying a healthy social group is one in which people do not trust each other and are always trying to trigger each other? (just for my understanding) 

I never understand what points you are trying to make. Like here you are blending part of the discussion from yesterday about games like EVE providing better socialization opportunities due to both positive and negative interactions into this conversation about what sort of personality type are you in real life vs in a game?

What do you really want to know?