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Duke Nukem Forever Release Date..Kinda
PunkMonk
Member Posts: 483
Edit: For giving people false hope.
Still kept the link there for people who care.
Comments
Right. I'll believe it when I am holding a cardboard box in my hands.
We barely remember who or what came before this precious moment;
We are choosing to be here right now -Tool, Parabola
Well, if it is indeed coming out (finally), I hope to all that's holy (and unholy as well, if it helps) that Duke is once again in FPS mode. If they screw the pooch and make it another Tombraider wannabe like the last two ( Time to Kill and World of the Babes), I'll pass it faster than a kidney stone on prune juice steroids.
Hail to the King, Baby!!!!
My God... Could it be?
Hell yeah! what was it? 9 years in development?
From the main page
"
No, you cannot pre-order the game. If you see some online store saying "We are taking pre-orders", they're just trying to get your money (they usually also make up their own supposed "insider release date info", too). There is no release date set, we are not taking pre-orders for the game. End of story.
Once we begin taking pre-orders, believe us, you'll know about it.
The release date of this game is "When it's done". Anything else, and we mean anything else is someone's speculation. There is no date. We don't know any date. If you have a friend who claims they have "inside info", or there's some game news site, or some computer store at the mall who claims they know - they do not. They are making it up. There is no date. Period.
And yes, we know the game has taken a long time. There's no possible joke you could make about the game's development time that we haven't already heard.
"
Thread was opened in their official forums, was locked and stated that it was a false advertisement.
From the main page
"
No, you cannot pre-order the game. If you see some online store saying "We are taking pre-orders", they're just trying to get your money (they usually also make up their own supposed "insider release date info", too). There is no release date set, we are not taking pre-orders for the game. End of story.
Once we begin taking pre-orders, believe us, you'll know about it.
The release date of this game is "When it's done". Anything else, and we mean anything else is someone's speculation. There is no date. We don't know any date. If you have a friend who claims they have "inside info", or there's some game news site, or some computer store at the mall who claims they know - they do not. They are making it up. There is no date. Period.
And yes, we know the game has taken a long time. There's no possible joke you could make about the game's development time that we haven't already heard.
"
Thread was opened in their official forums, was locked and stated that it was a false advertisement.
Somehow this news doesnt suprise me
From the main page
"
No, you cannot pre-order the game. If you see some online store saying "We are taking pre-orders", they're just trying to get your money (they usually also make up their own supposed "insider release date info", too). There is no release date set, we are not taking pre-orders for the game. End of story.
Once we begin taking pre-orders, believe us, you'll know about it.
The release date of this game is "When it's done". Anything else, and we mean anything else is someone's speculation. There is no date. We don't know any date. If you have a friend who claims they have "inside info", or there's some game news site, or some computer store at the mall who claims they know - they do not. They are making it up. There is no date. Period.
And yes, we know the game has taken a long time. There's no possible joke you could make about the game's development time that we haven't already heard.
"
Thread was opened in their official forums, was locked and stated that it was a false advertisement.
Somehow this news doesnt suprise me
Screw it. By the time they're done, the only pills Duke will be poppin' ingame will be Geritol.
i hope my grandchildren live to see the day when this game releases
....and since im only 17 thats really saying something
lol, funny thing is they prolly wont
Hahahahahahahahahahaha.....
<gasps for air>
Hahahahahahahaha!!!!!
...no, seriously, it'll never happen. Duke Nukem got perished in a back alley in Hong Kong, stabbed to death by three transvestite hookers in leather bondage gear, one of them being a dwarf. His estate has mandated that his image may not be used in any further videogames. Rest well, Duke.
Believing this game will ever be released is the kind of blind, insane faith that causes people to drink poison Kool-Aid.
To the Nukem faithful I say repent! Let the Duke rest, with his awesome catalogue of games untarnished. Practice your vile necromancy to raise this lich of a game and you shall damn his glorious name! A game in development for fourty years cannot possibly be good. Just as Derek Smart.
Fixed the date for you, thats the trend atleast.
Don't worry man we all make mistakes. You mistook DNF as being a normal developed (company cares about revenue) type of game.
Wow, what a bummer. Sorry all.
I just find it so funny because the company actually does work on it, they have people who come in every day and work on it and get paid an they have investors, and they actually think of it as being almost done, yet at the same time probably know themselves itll never be released
50 lashes for falsely declaring the return of The King. To be carried out with a whip made of heavily salted pigcop skin.
lol, I just sent an e-mail to Best Buy about this
That is actually quite funny though.
Logs of the producer.
Friday, 07/20
7 A.M.: Just got in the office, noticed ted is wearring his wacky tie again, think I'll go talk to him about it.
8:30 A.M. : Ted just quit, he didn't work here or anything but we found his wacky ties to be great.
9:00 A.M. : Well Sue over at develop--whatever said that we'll have a alpha release of the stress test later on this week.
9:30 A.M. : Sues dead...we don't know what happend...it's all a blur, first the flash fires then the explosion..
11:30 A.M. : Teds back, he isn't himself though, something is odd...he isn't wearing one of his ties...and ..
12:00 P.M. : We had to tie Ted down, he seems to be having some sort of fever, probally bird flu, we'll be contacting the CDC in a bit.
1:45 P.M. : Frank just asked for the tps reports for the quarterly income, 37.00 roughly.
2:00 P.M. : Frank's dead, Ted escaped and crushed his scull, we don't know how he got out of his restraints.
2:45 P.M. : We found Ted's tie, blood all over.
3:35 P.M. : Nobody is comming, I've locked myself in the coffee lounge, people keep trying to get in but I stop them, I don't know how long I have.
4:00 P.M. :We're out of coffee...some survivors from accounting have made their way here throught the old ventilation units, we're planning to make it to the roof in a few hours.
6:00 P.M. : I should be off work by now, but I can't leave, those bastards from accounting left without me, saying I spend more time on these logs than escaping the horrors outside, little do they know I know they will soon be dead, the board members elected to have logical puzzles placed through out the building in case people decided to have go have "work sex" or "leave".
7:30 P.M. : I have decided to move deeper into the office in hopes of finding some weapons, I currently have a "I'm a happy kitty" mug a nerf gun and three staplers..I'll write more as I can though these diaries are hard.
7:31 P.M.: Hey I found that snickers I lost last week.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
What will happen? How far can this go? Will astro keep with these logs or simply forget about it in favor of softcore porn on cinimax? We'll find out.
That is actually quite funny though.
Logs of the producer.
Friday, 07/20
7 A.M.: Just got in the office, noticed ted is wearring his wacky tie again, think I'll go talk to him about it.
8:30 A.M. : Ted just quit, he didn't work here or anything but we found his wacky ties to be great.
9:00 A.M. : Well Sue over at develop--whatever said that we'll have a alpha release of the stress test later on this week.
9:30 A.M. : Sues dead...we don't know what happend...it's all a blur, first the flash fires then the explosion..
11:30 A.M. : Teds back, he isn't himself though, something is odd...he isn't wearing one of his ties...and ..
12:00 P.M. : We had to tie Ted down, he seems to be having some sort of fever, probally bird flu, we'll be contacting the CDC in a bit.
1:45 P.M. : Frank just asked for the tps reports for the quarterly income, 37.00 roughly.
2:00 P.M. : Frank's dead, Ted escaped and crushed his scull, we don't know how he got out of his restraints.
2:45 P.M. : We found Ted's tie, blood all over.
3:35 P.M. : Nobody is comming, I've locked myself in the coffee lounge, people keep trying to get in but I stop them, I don't know how long I have.
4:00 P.M. :We're out of coffee...some survivors from accounting have made their way here throught the old ventilation units, we're planning to make it to the roof in a few hours.
6:00 P.M. : I should be off work by now, but I can't leave, those bastards from accounting left without me, saying I spend more time on these logs than escaping the horrors outside, little do they know I know they will soon be dead, the board members elected to have logical puzzles placed through out the building in case people decided to have go have "work sex" or "leave".
7:30 P.M. : I have decided to move deeper into the office in hopes of finding some weapons, I currently have a "I'm a happy kitty" mug a nerf gun and three staplers..I'll write more as I can though these diaries are hard.
7:31 P.M.: Hey I found that snickers I lost last week.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
What will happen? How far can this go? Will astro keep with these logs or simply forget about it in favor of softcore porn on cinimax? We'll find out.
I would play that game.
9:45 P.M. : Tired, so tired. I finally made it through the customer registration puzzle, amazing how you don't notice a 30 foot tall gargoyle with angellic wings holding a spear and three swords, just a hint the puzzle only took a small matter of explosives to solve, screw finding six arcane gems of cthulu, I want the ^#%& out now.
10:30 P.M. : This is getting tougher, writing these logs and battling these things is getting to me, I have decided I will write while fighting that way I can multi task like a true producer.
10:43 P.M. : Well this sucks ass, I came upon Debby from customer service, you know that hot latina chick with the nice ass? Well it wasn't so nice when I saw it now, or atleast half of it. Debby tried to make out with me using her teeth, not sexy. After I put her down I decided to investigate how hot she was, she had the cutest little tatoo...what?
11:30 P.M. : I found the remains of Accounting team, they appear to have been devored by beasts, this is actually scary now, Accounting team was our best, they kept the company afloat while we made no profits, if those beasts can do this to them who am I to survive?
12:37 A.M. : I've made it to a data save room, finally. I plan to log into world of warcraft later on and see whats up with the guild, sucks theres no mic, no vent.. On other news I'll be making it to the swag room in the early morning.
3:35 A.M. : Seems like no alliance on, all those horde undead in goldenshire are really getting on my nerves. I'll be going to sleep now, I have set up a great monster catcher in the main hallway to the server room, oddly enough theres a type writer here too.
6:00 A.M.: I woke up an hour ago and after logging into wow to check my auctions I decided to sneak around, I found a conviently placed terminal right in the copy room! I uploaded the map of the building to my producer special PDA
The red appears to be me, while the red splotches look to be red splotches, the green is my destination. The swag room.
7:00 A.M. : I found my way past the hordes of the walking dead , I'm now at the green dot.
7:22 A.M. : It appears that this map was designed by the server techs, it outlays not a weapon but a snack cache, primarily twinkies. It's a good thing I got those weapons off of accounting team otherwise I'd be dead, well time to stock up on twinkies.
8:30 A.M. : Sick of twinkies, time to go.
12:00 P.M: I've decided that I can't leave on the ground floor, I need to go to the third floor and access the worker duct into the sewers, the roof is crawling with ravens, who the hell designed this place? Capcon?
1:45 P.M: It's been over 24 hours and no police, things are looking ugly it appears our whole work force was laid off by the initial attack. haha I am even funny in a crisis, laid off..I gotta write that down.
2:50 A.M. : It's been a long time since I can stop, the hordes keep comming, I can't stop them all my ammo is low and I've just barely made it to sector 2 (floor 2 for you non-zombie slaying producers), I'm heading to the meeting room now.
My inventory taken by my PDA's awsome megapixel skills.
Dunno how there going to do that. THe Developer/ mastermind of Duke Nuken has been dead a few years now.. was eve non thier main website of the longest.
It..Burns..
Resident Evil Solid X- Chains of forever. <---exciting japanese name added for hype
Duke Nukem F**king Never
Agent_X7 AKA J Star
[/URL]
Notice: The views expressed in this post are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of MMORPG.com or its management.
3:54 A.M. : I've finally made it to the meeting this morning, many files about but I couldn't get to them thanks to the reanimated corpses of accounting team, this really sucks..My paycheck is somewhere in there, I'll need explosives.
5:30 A.M. : I knew those psycho's over at level design had a nice salvo but damn! Military grade explosives, C4. I'll be taking down Accounting Team shortly.
6:45 A.M. : I'm working my way back but it appears the hordes have moved into sector 2 faster than expected I'll need to move into the vents if I am to make it through this.
12:00 P.M.: Accounting team is goo, but so is my paycheck, in the rubble I noticed a glinting object, i naturally picked it up..Appears to be a data file.
12:22 P.M. : Why wasn't I informed? This would of made finding a new job easier on me.
I won't be so sure if I was in you.
That's what they say.
It looks to me like a big hoax.
I think 3DRealms meant to develope Duke Forever, but after ID sequels and Unreal series, they just gave up.
I think they moved the goal post so many times after a new FPS came out, that they just didn't have any fresh ideas anymore in order to live up to the hype.
To be honest a game like Quake 4 or Doom3 costs millions to make, those game took maximun 2 years to be developed.
DNF has been in developement for so long, that if it was real that it has been in developement for so long, it won't be profitable anymore, and that is if the game is going to be the best FPS ever (which I doubt).
Duke Nukem is an "Urban Myth", It's nice to discuss about it, but I don't think the game is currently in developement.
They might decide one day to resurrect the franchise though, but don't hold your breath.
As someone said, probably our grandchildren will have the honor to play DNF, I don't think it s going to be done within the next few years.